Please get your forms in by noon on the 20th

Tonight we were discussing employee evaluations at work and decided perhaps we should have home evaluations as well. Here is a summary of what was discussed.

Dave on Liz:
Liz is froo froo, she won’t try new things, she can’t keep secrets and she gets around. She is not however, snooty. Liz is a communist. Liz has stolen Dave’s tv show and ruined it for him.

Dave on Karen:
Karen is also froo froo and a communist. Karen has recently started making everyone who gets up get her stuff. Karen says it is because she is really pregnant and it is hard to move. Dave has better things to do with his time besides make Karen “milk shakes” all day. Karen also has stolen Dave’s tv shows in the past and Dave will have to go back and start completely over.

Karen on Dave:
Dave is continually trying to give Karen a heart attack by making plans to sell barbeque out of a van on the side of the road with a guy named Andy that she has never met. Karen would like a camera crew to follow Dave around and record all the things he says so when he tells her that certain parts of her lower half are in severe pain from her lying she will have evidence.

Karen on the dogs:
They smell bad and shed too much. Casey is way past his expiration date and if the cat tries to make out with her anymore, the cat is permanently moving to the porch.

Dave on the dogs:
Casey doesn’t smell bad. He has a purebred smell that is neither good nor bad. As soon as he passes, he will immediately be replaced with another giant hairy red dog.

Liz on Dave:
Dave doesn’t listen very well. He should just accept the fact that Liz does not eat beef or pork. He should also stop trying to convince her that her life would change for the better if she would just eat more meats. Liz is not a communist. Liz enjoys watching television with the entire household and Dave will not cooperate and refuses to join in the social activities therefore putting a halt to all household good time fun.

Liz on the dogs:
When it is cold, the dogs are obligated to keep Liz warm.

Karen on Liz:
The color of Liz’s hair is dirty.

Liz on Karen:
On her birthday, Karen has a responsibility to celebrate herself.

As if you spent your morning doing anything better.

I'm sorry Ann, but when you posted this picture of Evan, I got all these images in my head and I had to get them out. Your son looks like he could be robbing trains in the Old West for a living (or maybe in the New West. I don't know how easy that would be these days). Please don't take offense. I think your son is very cute. Emily said you would be ok with it so get mad at her instead.

I may not be a good artist but I know what funny is.

Also, sorry that some lady decided to wear the tightest jeans she could find on the ranch.